The 16' Retractable Leash

This is about the first time I used a long, retractable leash with the Babies. Yes, I’m one of those assholes who had those leashes extending from one end of the block to the other. And I don’t give a crap what anyone thinks. Those leashes made walking two big dogs much easier. They had more freedom to move around. It gave them some privacy and space when they used the bathroom. They had more room to explore on the grounds by the sidewalk. Granted, I do not suggest using such leashes for every dog. If a dog is too unmanageable and uncontrollable, another type of leash should be chosen in place of these long retractable ones.

The first time I used one with the Babies was during our evening walk. I still used the choke collar I had used with the shorter leashes. I kept the leash at about 3 or 4 feet at first. The Babies didn’t notice anything different initially. We made our way down the hall and out front to the sidewalk. I still kept the leash at a short distance. When we got to the intersection, we stopped at the light. I thought we’d try out the extension on the way across the street. About halfway across the street, I un-clicked the lock so the leash could freely extend. Immediately, I could feel the separation between me and the Babies. In tandem, their little legs start to speed up as they realized their new found freedom. They kept hustling until the leash went as far as they could go. It was as if the Babies were thinking “We’re free!!”

They didn’t question or balk at their new roaming abilities. They explored and sniffed around at things they had not experienced before. I quickly learned how to retract the leash such as when I needed to keep close control over the Babies. I tended to shorten the leash when on the sidewalks but extend it inside the park.

Those leashes were worth every penny I spent on them.

Mixed Messages

By the Municipal Bldg

Who in the hell puts a “No Loitering” sign directly above a bench? Somebody who works for the city of Raleigh, that’s who. I took this photo at the Municipal Building (a.k.a. “City Hall”), which is across the street from where I used to live. On one hand, the bench says “Have a seat. Relax.” But on the other hand, the sign says “Get the fuck out!”


I suspect what is defined as ‘loitering’ is left to the discretion of Raleigh police officers. People sitting there in the day during lunch: good; homeless people sleeping there at night: bad. The sign gives fair notice to potential violators should they take the risk of camping out there overnight. The homeless are a sturdy lot here in Raleigh. They can seemingly sleep anywhere and often do.

I think there are hidden reasons for that sign. However, on the surface, the sign juxtaposed against the bench sends an odd and mixed message and looks silly.

Anecdotes from Our Walks Downtown:The Schizophrenic

Nash Square

Statue of Josephus Daniels, Fmr Secy of Navy and FDR's old boss

There is a story of one woman I can’t forget because of how sad it was. The first time I saw her, I didn’t think much of her. She looked ordinary. Sitting at a park bench, she was working on a crossword puzzle. I guess she was in her late 40’s or early 50’s. She had the look of a librarian or a secretary.


We didn’t pass directly by her. Her bench laid on a ‘spoke’ from the circle the babies and I went around. About a quarter of a way through the walk, I heard her yell in a shrill voice “Get away, get away.” She flicked her hands trying to shoo something away. I thought she was yelling at someone, a bird or a squirrel. As I looked closely, she was all by herself. Nothing was around her. She was yelling at an invisible intruder. The woman was schizophrenic.

I was taken aback. She looked clean and well cared for. This is in contrast to the other schizophrenics I’ve seen in Raleigh and Greensboro. The other guys I’ve seen had matted down hair and a wardrobe that was torn and mismatched. They also smelled ‘gamey.’

I would see this woman several more times. I wondered if she lived with her family or if she was institutionalized. Every time I did see her, she would be agitated and fuss at the demons she conjured up.

Anecdotes from Our Walks DowntownMen Using the Bathroom, pt 1

The bushes have been removed.

On our walks, the babies and I would encounter strange things. What is described below is what I call a “bathroom incident.” As the name suggests, we stumbled across someone using the bathroom in a public place.


One time, we were taking an extended walk. Normally on an extended walk, we would go beyond the park across the street to other parts of downtown. I particularly liked going to the State Capitol when it was lit up at night. I also liked going down the renovated Fayetteville Street. Before the renovation, Fayetteville Street had been converted into a pedestrian mall back in the 70’s. It seemed like a good idea at the time. City leaders thought people would come back to the downtown area if the main street downtown resembled a mall at a shopping center, and it was the malls luring businesses from the downtown area. It was a bust. Downtown businesses seemingly closed at a faster rate after the Fayetteville Street Mall project.

We were almost home. The babies were sauntering down the street at their normal cadence, Andy on the left and Abby on the right. Suddenly, Abby took a hard right into the bushes by a parking deck. I tugged at her leash; she resisted. I snapped at her to come back to me. Finally, she returned to the sidewalk. Curious, I peeked into the bushes myself. I thought someone may have thrown some old food there. Much to my surprise there was a man squatting with a roll of toilet paper in his hand. He was taking a shit. Nobody said anything to anyone. Awkward. The best thing to do in such a situation is to act like nothing happened at all.

I felt bad for the guy because we invaded his privacy. I felt bad because he had to use the bathroom outside in the first place.

My First Home

The summer of 2002 was winding down. I had thought about buying a house, but since I was living with my mom, I took my time to find a place. One day when I was walking the babies downtown, I thought “I should get a place down here.” I decided to get a condo for several reasons. Deep down, I knew I’d have to move from Raleigh to a place where houses are too damned expensive. I didn’t want to spoil myself, so I chose a condo instead.


I also chose the downtown area because it was close, but not too close to my mom’s. A few years later when my dad was sick and I had to come over every day, that decision paid off well. I also didn’t want to live more than 30 min from work. I was right at the cusp of that criteria. Lastly, I knew Abby would love it down there. It was always hard to get her going, but a trip downtown always excited her. There was also a park right across the street from where my unit was.

One problem of buying a condo downtown is that what is a nice panoramic view one moment is a nice view of a 20 story building put up the next year. I knew that with a park sitting there, no development would ever take place there. I would always have a nice view of the downtown Raleigh skyline. The noise wasn’t too bad. I’m a heavy sleeper.

My condo was actually a loft. It was my first place and I no longer had to fret as a renter and worry about some asshole landlord looking over my shoulder. I was also excited to see how Abby would like it.

It's the One You Least Suspect orAbby Bit Someone

They really were playing.

On one our downtown walks as part of Abby's exercise regimen, we were going down Glenwood South when we came across two Hispanic males. They showed some interest in the dogs and made some small talk with me. One guy asked me how much Abby weighed. Before I could give him an answer, the guy bent over, grabbed Abby and picked her up.




"What the hell is this idiot doing?" I thought. The guy didn't ask for permission or gave no indication of what he was going to do. The guy made some comment to the second guy. The second guy leaned over and petted Abby on her back. Abby turned her head around and snapped at the guy. The second guy jerked his hand away and both guys started laughing. I'm not sure if Abby made contact with her teeth to that guy's hand. For Abby , this was no joke. I've never seen her act hostilely towards a person in anger before.



I got the babies and got the hell out of there as fast we could. I didn't want these guys calling animal control to report my Baby Girl. I didn't want my Baby Girl to have a record.



Before this incident, if I had to guess which dog would most likely bite a person, Father would have been the odds on favorite by far. He was a tough dog that knew how to take care of himself and took no shit. Andy would have been my second guess. He was kind of squirrelly when he was younger. He was a sweet baby but he spooked easily. I've also seen him make teethies at some kids who got too close to him. I worried about Andy and any kids when Andy was around kids. I didn't like him snarling at kids.



Abby was a sweetheart and an angel. She seemed to be an anchor of stability and had a good temperament. I thought she would have been the last dog of mine to bite someone. This episode demonstrates how a seemingly nice dog can be pushed too far and resort to violence.

Downtown Walks: A New Routine

In the last year I was in NJ, my visits to NC would be topped off with a walk with the babies in the downtown area. I could have walked them in our neighborhood, but considering my experiences with people trying to hit me with their cars, throwing things at me, threatening to shoot me or having dogs try to attack me, a Sunday walk seemed like a jaunt in a minefield rather than a relaxing moment with the babies. No, instead, I took them to the downtown Raleigh area. On Sundays, the north part is where much of the government offices and buildings are. The place is isolated and I had it essentially all to myself. I especially liked going by the Victorian homes by the Oakwood district. Many of those houses are over a hundred years old and are quaint and picturesque. A movie (part) was filmed in that neighborhood in the early 80’s, Brainstorm. That movie would be Natalie Woods last.


Anyway, the downtown area on Sunday isn’t completely desolate. There are churches seemingly on every block. I avoided those areas and besides, parking was terrible on Sunday mornings. At one of the downtown churches, Edenton Street Methodist Church, John Edwards is a member of the congregation. Elizabeth Edward’s funeral was held in that church. I’m glad I wasn’t living in Raleigh at the time because I would have been tempted to heckle those Westboro Baptist Church protestors who showed up at Edwards’ funeral.

I didn’t have to twist the babys’ arms to get them to go bye-bye. All I had to do was ask these words: Do you want to go bye-bye? Their heads would pop-up like a jack-in-the-box and head straight towards the door. I would put the seats down in the hatchback so Andy could sit while Abby would sit in the front seat. Andy would actually lie down the whole trip and watch me and Abby. Abby would sit up statuesque straight so she could see what was going on.

Parking is easy and free in downtown Raleigh on Sunday mornings for the most part. I’d roll into a spot on the street, put the leashes on the babies and head out to the sidewalk. The babies and I would go around a mile or two. I had to monitor their heat level so they wouldn’t get in trouble. They took in all the smells and sights. We had the place to ourselves. Needless to say, this was a good way to exercise Abby. She always had weight problems, bored easily and had tendencies for laziness. These walks always grabbed her interest and she never tired of them. She eagerly went bye-bye every time. Andy liked going bye-bye but he also liked being around us. He loved our company.

These jaunts to downtown Raleigh would affect where I lived when I moved back after living in NJ a few years. While I was taking the babies for these walks, I never thought about exactly where I’d live in Raleigh if I moved back. I didn’t even know they had condos there.