Friday, February 24, 2012

Sticking It to the Man!
AT&T Loses in Small Claims Court

AT&T lost a "throttling case" which makes me very happy. Throttling means a data service provider deliberately slowing down a customer's down-load time to restrict a customer's access to the service. An AT&T customer said that AT&T was deliberately slowing down his service on his unlimited plan to restrict his usage. This slow-down was a violation of his contract with AT&T and a small claims court agreed. The man won $850.

That's how you stick it to the man.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

An Awful Coincidence From Portlandia Just Days Before Whitney Houston's Death

Merely 8 days before Whitney Houston died, Portlandia did sketch making fun of one of Whitney's songs, calling it "pabulum." For those who don't know what that $20 word means, it describes things that are banal, bland or insipid.

I was watching IFC on demand, Portlandia 205, and saw the couple mocking music snobs who barged in on a school meeting and tried to censor music. They were talking about how the music the children listened to now would have a lifelong impact, so the couple wanted to keep music crap away from them. That is when they blasted Mike and the Mechanics and Whitney Houston.

I guess it was funny at the time, but 8 days after it aired, Whitney died. Talk about an awful coincidence.

Then again, I have to agree with Martin Mull: "Talking about music is like dancing about architecture."

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Confessions of a Hater
New York Times Wedding Announcements

They annoy the shit out of me. I don't truly know why. It simply does.

The format of them typically go like this "She" is wonderful; "He" is wonderful.
Together they will be just wonderful.

 And it seems like he and she met at some snotty Ivy league school. I doubt you'd see a Montclair State graduate grace the pages of the NYT wedding announcements.

Additionally, you'll never see some couple from somewhere like Flemington, NJ or even Staten Island. I also think the NYT corporate by-laws forbid announcing the wedding if  he or she were below the Mason-Dixon Line.

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Archie on the Pool Steps

Since it was warm on Saturday, I thought I'd see if Archie would enjoy standing in the water: he didn't. We were both on the steps so I took the chance and picked him up. As I lowered him into the pool, I could feel his chubby body start to stiffen and I could see his legs splayed in his futile attempt to avoid the water. I only put his paws in. Since it was apparent he wasn't ready yet, I put him back on the side.

I then tried to cajole him in instead of coercing him but didn't get anywhere with it. Archie, however, did show interest in me when I got on the top step. I could see his face focused on me and the steps. I further enticed him by stepping down on the second step. Archie grew even more interested. He reached his paw out to me as if he wanted to get to me or have me pick him up. After a moment, I stepped out of that cold water and let my numb feet warm up.

I think if the day were warmer, the water level a little higher so he wouldn't have to do down so far to get in or if I had gotten in all the way, Archie, too, would have gone in. He seems very interested in the pool.

Saturday, February 18, 2012

Public Speaking & Compliments
Revealing Lowered Expectations

In 2 of the 3 times I've spoken in public for law school, my professors, while ostensibly giving me a compliment, revealed how they had a lowered expectation of me before I spoke. The other time, the professors didn't reveal any judgments of how they thought I'd do when I publicly spoke. But even then while I was receiving feed-back from fellow students, one guy said my personality seemed to switch "on" when I started to speak.

The first public speaking for me in law school was a 10 minute summary judgment (fake) at a local courthouse (real but off-hours). Two days later when our class next met, our professor gave one-on-one evaluations. It's hard to do her inflection justice and subsequently for me to make my point. She said "You really did a good job. I mean it." I smiled, thanked her and went on my way. Later, I thought of how she stressed the word "really" as if she expected me to stand up and speak in hoots and clicks in the courthouse.

The other day, I had feed-back from my professor after my 5min presentation in my tax law course. My professor liked my talk, saying it was fun and how I was funny (No small feat in tax law). She then said how there are some people who are completely different on-stage in comparison to off-stage, me being one of those people. She said she'd like to see me be more like the "on-stage me" while off-stage. Who knows what she thought of me before that talk or what she thought I'd sound like on-stage before I spoke. Like my professor from a year ago, I think she, too, had a lowered expectation of what my public speaking skills would be before I spoke.

Friday, February 17, 2012

Justice Breyer Robbed
And so was the gun-control crowd

Recently, Justice Breyer was robbed but more importantly, the gun-control crowd was robbed as well. A machete-wielding thug robbed Breyer and his wife while they were vacationing in their home in the West Indies.   It's too bad the robber used a machete. Now the gun-control crowd can't scream like banshees about taking away our guns.They would have delighted standing atop on their righteous indignation about the backwood hill-billy hayseeds and their guns.

When the robber used a machete instead of a gun, it robbed the anti-gun people a chance of plastering such headlines as "ARMED GUNMAN ROBS JUSTICE BREYER." Instead, all we got was a tepid "Breyer robbed at West Indies vacation home."

This incident reminds me of a gun-control argument Archie Bunker and his daughter were having. After the daughter rattled off a statistic about how many people were killed by guns each year, Archie asked her "Would it make you feel better if they were pushed out of windows?"

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Archie's Palate

I didn't find out Abby loved apples until she was 3 or 4 years old. I found out Archie likes apples before he was 3 months old. Both dogs would/do beg for apples and patiently wait for me to eat but if I lollygagged too much, they would/will both bark at me. I couldn't believe something so cute and innocent looking as Archie could be so damned aggressive about food.

He loves the smell of pizza and the taste of pizza crust.

Pigs Ears
Archie eats one everyday. He could probably eat more if my mom dolled out more to him.

Cayenne peppers
Archie loves to eat those right off the vine. We still have some on the stalk from last season, so much so we didn't know what to do with them so we left the excess on the plant. Archie found a way to get rid of them.

Saturday, February 11, 2012

One Star??!!!!!
Comcast Gave Red Dawn One Star!

One fucking star for Red Dawn, the 1984 version. I couldn't believe that. The movie is awesome. It embodied the hysteria lurking under the surface of our lives in the Cold War Era.

Besides, it had a star-studded cast. Patrick Swayze was there, 80's but pre-mullet. William Smith, Conan's father, played the godless, amoral, pinko Commie sent to the U.S. to flush out the Wolverines. And Charlie Sheen had a role, too.

Then there was Baby. Need I say more?

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Archie & Guilt

When I left Raleigh the other day, Archie was sitting in the kitchen much like he was in the picture above looking up at me quizzically like "Where are you going?" He had his little head cocked to the side for added emphasis.

It made me feel guilty.

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Archie's Developing Personality

He loves to play with sticks but he doesn't retrieve them with the gusto Abby and Andy did at that age. He may  gnaw on a tennis ball but he doesn't retrieve those either. I wonder if his eyesight is bad.

He loves people food. Every time I'm at the refridgertor he sits down and stares at me with great interest. He loves McDonalds and apples.

He also loves to chew on things. My mom swears he's worse than Abby was, but she's wrong. Archie doesn't come anywhere close to the naughtiness Abby showed at that age. Yet, Abby turned out to be a good girl.

When I whistle, he goes nuts. He whines and cries. He cocks his head to the side and then tries to jump up on me. I found this out when I was whistling to that credit card commercial when sprayer was painting objects gold and the gold paint dripped down from the objects.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Random Thought:
One Way to Tell You're Getting Old

You no longer watch MTV.

 I was never a regular viewer even when I was young but they had some shows that kept bringing me back in. No longer, though. Like Bugs Bunny, Porky Pig and Romper Room, MTV doesn't interest me anymore.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

The Joker


That is one of the few nicknames Archie has. The poor thing was dropped by his mother (or so the owners say) when he was very little. He needed stitches and now has a scar and this little smirk on his left side of his face. I call it a sneer; others have said it looks like a smile. The vet in Virginia believes the scar and "smile" will go away, possibly completely, when Archie gets bigger.

My brother said Archie looks like the Phantom of the Opera. I also said we should put a patch on his eye and call him a pirate or Moshe Dayan. Regardless, he's a cute little bastard, but he does have sharp teethies.

My mom forgot what a hard project it was to train Abby. I guess she didn't read my blog because I chronicled in detail the difficulties we had raising Abby when she was a wild-ass little puppy. My mom forgets how damned aggressive Abby was. After spending a weekend with Abby, my arms would have cuts and whelps all up and down them from when Abby had bitten me, scratched me and jumped on me.

I say this because my mom has done nothing but bitch about the dog and how much work he has been. She has even thought about handing him over to me and have me take him to my place.

Talk about an ingrate.

Can't Some Professors Take a Hint?

When I'm sitting in the back-row with my eyes looking straight down at my desk, can't they take a hint that I don't want to be called on?

Friday, February 3, 2012

Random Thought:
Who Would Win In a Fight With Each Other?

The recent Egyptian soccer rioters or English soccer hooligans?

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Vegan Shoes!?
What Kind of Horseshit Is That?

I was looking for shoes the other day on and saw a choice among "Specialty Shoes": Vegan Shoes. Immediately, I thought "Vegan shoes? Are these disphits going to wear the shoes or eat them?"